Patient Endurance: How To Solve Problems By Not Solving Problems

I was sitting there, enflamed by anger sparked by the present moment's arch-nemesis.

A villain that got the best out of my emotions, simply by existing.

I didn't want to be this angry.

I took a shower, hoping to rinse off the gasoline coming from my pores.

It didn't solve the problem.

Then I walked out of the water and wrote a private, un-sendable letter to this entity, arranging words to accurately tell them what I thought about them.

I felt it help a bit, but a bit left the door ajar just enough for the flames to continue to creep in.

I thought I was beyond a place like this.

That my meditation practice, or a stoic face would deflect all emotion. But here I was, forced to deal with emotions that I wanted to forfeit.

Maybe an hour or two later, the electric stove of my vitriol got turned off.

I cooled down.

But it was a needed reminder that sometimes you have to sit with unwelcome emotional guests, and allow impermanence to evaporate what tries to agitate.

--

If you're an American, you're conditioned to expect, and demand relief at a moment's notice.

For anxiety: pop a xanax.

For a meal: tap that app.

For sex: swipe in that other app.

For wisdom: seek out the guru in the search bar.

But maybe equally as often, our urge to solve our problem turns into us jiggling the knife handle through our guts.

We take actions that make the situation worse.

Or we take action that solves the problem, but leaves us restless.

What I hope follows is some advice that I often need myself: let the problem un-problem itself.

It's easy to brandish labels like "lazy," but sometimes time heals wounds, rests eyes, and even acts as an enforcer, submitting problems to its Saturnian will.

Let's talk about something just as Saturnian: "patient endurance." And the solutions that arise when we allow ourselves to be at rest.

What Is Patient Endurance

The Buddha said patient endurance is the "supreme incinerator of the defilements." Defilements being: all of your bad habits, actions, unproductive thoughts, and intentions.

But we're bombarded with immediacy. Tempted by it.

The newest news at the top, with an endless scroll on the bottom, and us driven thirsty for ephemeral rewards and shiny visuals.

Ajahn Chah once said:

"All the teachings in this world can be contained in this one teaching: aniccam (impermanence). Think about it. I've searched for over forty years as a monk and this is all I could find. That and patient endurance."

Another teaching that helps explain patient endurance is the "we'll see" story.

So, what is patient endurance? To put it as plainly as possible: it's sitting through your present experience, accepting it, whatever it is, and letting it cease on its own once it's been experienced.

To practice patient endurance is simple, but incredibly difficult.

It's why we have so many diversions in life competing to take us out of the present and put us into a trance state. It's uncomfortable to sit there and endure until your experience changes.

But, I'd argue that patiently enduring (just like that we'll see story) can actually solve a lot of problems for us.

The Problem Solving Magic of Anicca

Anicca is impermanence. The impermanence of everything we are and experience in this world.

It's the natural movement of life. Things arise and then they cease.

It's when we try to force action and results that we start to suffer.

And sure, if we're not a monk (and even if we are one), some things will need to get done. Some accomplishments will need to happen. You'll need to drink water and eat food.

But again, it's when we try to force events to play out in the image of our whims that we start to feel the negative effects.

It's just a fact of life that when we try to get something, we're simultaneously psychologically stabbing ourselves a little bit.

Since we understand that we have obligations in this world, let's move on to another truth: arising and ceasing can be our ally.

In astrology, every hour or so, a new planet has rulership. In a Mars hour, you may have a bit more conflict, or conflicted feelings.

In a Sun hour, you may feel more driven, or willful.

And every 2.5 days or so, the Moon will enter a new sign.

If that sign is in your 10th house, you may deal with some matters involving your mother, or your prominence.

And then when the Moon moves on to the sign that occupies your 11th house, you may find yourself mingling with friends.

And every month, the other planets might shift from one sign in your chart to another, sparking events and changes you couldn't have completely foreseen.

You're free to believe what you wish, of course, but it can be enjoyable to watch how different aspects of your life pop up depending on the current transit.

And it's even better when something like a new Moon transit sparks circumstances that take care of that nagging problem you were dealing with for two days.

Regardless of whether you believe in astrology or not (and if you're on this website, I would hope you're at least open to it), you should feel confident enough to admit that when we stop acting, the world doesn't.

People take actions, have thoughts, and knock down dominoes that result in chain reactions that impact the rest of the interdependent world that surrounds them.

But it's reassuring to remember all of the times in your life that an argument fizzled out as the clock landed on different numbers, that communication issues found their own reparation as the days passed, or that a loved one's condition improved after the medicine was given some time to work its magic.

This isn't to say that time doesn't also bring its own curses, but it is to say that the curses and the blessings are subject to the same impermanence as our creasing skin, fresh produce, and favorite television shows.

Let's talk about some practical ways we can use that impermanence to our advantage, though.

How To Outsource Your Problem Solving To Impermanence

1) Asking 'Can This Wait A Day'?

Delaying is often frowned upon in the business world where promptness is rewarded (and punished, I should add), but it's helpful for multiple reasons to ask if something can be delayed.

Sleeping on a decision, letting emotions cool off before typing a reply, and getting things in order before you return a call can all be good ideas.

If something absolutely needs to be addressed immediately, then so be it.

But especially when we're dealing with difficult emotional, or interpersonal issues, letting a little time get between you and action can be the wisest course of action.

Firing off fire-breathing email may result in some regrets.

2) Sitting With Your Difficult Emotions And Allowing Them The Chance To Transform

I wrote a whole post on this kind of thing, so I'll leave you with that link again.

3) Doing The Necessary Prep-Work To Allow Time To Help

Like exercising and allowing time and sleep to build the muscle you stimulated, or putting down a creative problem and allowing distance to disentangle the solution that's hidden in the shadows -- you sometimes need to give yourself the best chance of success.

Luck is very important, but being ill-prepared to receive or put to use that luck would be regrettable.

Give yourself the best chance of success by doing what need done, and when possible, allow time to give you a helping hand.

It won't always, but it's better to stack the deck in your favor.

4) Paying Attention To The Current Astrological Transits

Asking which transits are coming up and evaluating which would facilitate the results you'd like to see can be very helpful.

It can also tell you the types of events that will be playing out in your life to some extent, regardless of what you do.

But this is another element that's benefitted by you preparing for those "right" moments.

If Mars is soon to be in your 5th house, maybe start looking into a diet or exercise change in preparation for it.

Or if Venus is in your 5th house and you'd like to meet some new people from companies you're interested in, start doing the prep-work for when Venus hits your 6th house.

Moon transits can often force your hand and get you involved with the house they're currently sitting in, but it's also helpful information. If you have a blog and you're in an 11th or 9th house Moon transit, it might help you to finally hit that "publish" button.

5) Look For Patterns And Try To Move With Them Instead of Against Them

This is another area where paying attention to astrological transits can help, but it's beneficial even if you have no interest in astrology.

Is there a certain day of the week where you find it harder to stick to your diet, a day where it feels easy to write, a date each month where you feel really motivated?

Try to look for patterns, and fight as few of them as you can.

If you're more likely to cheat on your diet on a Friday, either allow that to happen, or don't allow yourself to grocery shop until the day after.

A little journaling can help shine light on some of these things, but it does take a bit of effort.

The insight can be worth it, though.

Final Thoughts

I am not suggesting that you should stare at your boss until he submits to you doing none of the tasks he's put on your desk.

And I'm also not suggesting that we can stubbornly ignore our to-do lists until spirits cross them off for us.

When you need to do something to survive in society, do it while you're doing it, and put it down when you're done.

While that may be something we struggle with for the rest of our lives, I hope you can also see there is real value in letting some matters resolve themselves.

While the Keebler elves and artificial intelligences won't be fixing our lives as we sleep, there's billions of people out there acting during the moments we're at rest.

And sometimes that'll benefit us. And sometimes only if we put in the requisite prep-work.

So, do what you need to do, and appreciate the benefits of letting things untangle themselves when you're given the opportunity by this world to do so.

The Will And Won't Happen Horoscopes For June 2023

How Flash Cards And Mnemonics Can Help You Change Your Life Without Trying